Where Does Getting Shot Go on my Evaluation? Posted on February 17, 2018 by nmscienceteacher I
am a minimally effective teacher, at least according to the state of
New Mexico. If you listen to Secretary DeVos or even our acting
Secretary of Education for the state of New Mexico those of us who teach
at traditional public schools are lazy and uninspired. We only are
there for the short days and the summers off and we put our needs far
before the needs of our students.
But somehow, for
some reason, when tragedies like the Parkland or Newtown, or Columbine
happen no one is surprised to hear of teachers and coaches and janitors
and other school employees risking and sometimes giving their lives for
their students, for their kids. Those same self serving teachers somehow
transform into self-sacrificing heroes. We honor their stories and
their sacrifices.
And then, almost inevitably, it
turns back to those teachers and schools to not only continue with their
purpose of serving every kid that walks through their doors but now to
deal with the aftermath of a massacre and to try to prevent the next
one.
What are schools and teachers supposed to be doing?
Increasing
the physical security of their buildings. Great! But where’s the money
coming for that? Are people ready to have their property taxes go up? So
schools will make choices. Let’s get a new fence at my school rather
than replace the worn out desks. The kids may get scratched on the rough
edges, but we will have our barricade. What else are we willing to give
up? New playground equipment? Replacing outdated buildings? Up to date
technology? More Security Guards. So who are they
replacing, since no one wants to increase funding for schools. Teachers?
Educational assistants? Most of my classes are already bigger than what
is safe for teaching science. How about cops? I have
known some great SROs. But the reality is the presence of police on
school campuses greatly increases the likelihood of a school discipline
problem becoming a juvenile justice problem. And kids that end up in the
juvenile justice system are much more likely to become adults in the
justice system. Teachers (or administrators) should be
armed. No. Nope. No way. There are a lot of problems with this, but the
biggest is that there is a world of difference between knowing how to
shoot and knowing when to shoot. Even the police get it wrong (Tamir
Rice, for example) and they are trained for these situations. As a
parent I would be concerned if I knew staff members had weapons without a
very clear policy on training and storage. Increase the
psychological support for students. Most of us would love that. But it
is hard to connect to all of the students in a 30 person class that I
see for 82 minutes every other day. We have some mental health support
within the school and our school benefits from having a school-based
heath center which includes mental health professionals. New Mexico law
allows adolescents to get mental health support without having to
immediately notify the parents. We could do more of this. But to claim
that all school shooters are mentally ill or that those students who
struggle with mental illness are a threat is dangerous. And the reality
is that plenty of countries have the same issues with mental health
without the number of mass shootings. Hey look, Martha, it’s another teacher who is blaming everyone else for the failure of schools!
Then
what should we do? Perhaps teachers and school administrators should
not be the only ones bearing the weight of protecting our children (and
others) from mass shootings. Here are some ideas of what the other grown
ups could be doing:
Allowing the CDC to investigate gun violence. This has not been funded for two decades. Having good data informs good decisions. Five
states have laws that allow family members or law enforcement to
petition the courts to confiscate firearms from individuals who are seen
as threats to themselves or others. A law like this in Florida might
have prevented this tragedy. Bring back, in some form,
the so-called assault weapons ban. Important caveat: handguns are the
weapon in most cases of gun violence. However, during the assault
weapons ban (1994-2004) the number of gun massacres (defined by Louis
Klarevas in his book, Rampage Nation as 6 or more people shot and killed
in a single incident) dropped by 37% compared with the prior ten years
and deaths during those massacres by 43%. When the assault ban was
repealed, the following ten years saw a jump of 183% in massacres and
239% in deaths. There are other gun control measures
that have been shown to be effective, including permit-to-purchase that
should be part of any discussion. These would decrease not just the
chances of another mass killing like in Parkland, but all gun deaths. To
go back to the first point for schools, many schools, especially those
built pre-Columbine, were not built with security in mind and to make
them secure is often cost-prohibitive for districts. The reality is that
about 90% of all American students attend traditional public schools.
If we are truly serious about infrastructure investment at the Federal
level, we need to include schools in discussion. I’m
tired of kids dying. I don’t want to have to be a hero. I really don’t
want one of my colleagues to be a hero to protect my children. I know,
however, that those amazing teachers, and educational assistants, and
librarians, and coaches, and administrators, and security guards, and
janitors, and secretaries in Las Cruces Public Schools would do what
they could to make sure that my kids, both the three that live in my
house and all those who have passed through my classroom, would be safe.
So
to all of the other adults out there: we in the schools are working
every day to teach these cool, often amazing, sometime annoying, too
often sad, quite often funny children that pass through our classrooms,
despite inadequate funding, ever changing expectations, and nearly
constant criticism from people who have never even subbed in a k-12
classroom. Now it is your time. We only want your thoughts and prayers
if your thoughts are of how to make our schools safer and your prayers
are for doing what is right. We want you to act like the right of first
graders and high schoolers and, yes, ordinary public school teachers to
be able to live full lives are as important as the “right” to own a gun.
I
don’t know under what domain risking my life for my students would fall
in Danielson. But we all will be evaluated as ineffective if we do not
truly act to prevent another tragedy.
Imagine, if you want to, 25 thirteen year olds, sitting on the floor of their classroom, in the dark, backs against the wall, blinds closed, lights off, their 27 year old teacher sitting in the chair between them and the door.
Lock down drills are hard. They are always hard, but they are especially hard when it’s right after a shooting. Most of the kids are scared. You can tell the ones who are the most anxious, the way they hug their knees against their chests, their straight-lipped expressions, their eyes staring at the tiled floor. A few others are less scared and more annoyed, more frustrated, more bored. They try to whisper to their friends, to crack small jokes, to break the weird, uncomfortable tension that settles over a group of children practicing acting like they don’t exist. They think this is stupid, a waste of time. It wouldn’t really help them anyway, would it? Would THIS, sitting quiet and still in the dark, REALLY be enough to save them if THAT happened? If a man with a gun was coming for them? Would this REALLY be the best we can do?
And then there’s me. A lot of teachers have posted a lot of things over the last few days, about how this feels, about what this means. And it’s true- without even being asked, I would take a bullet for these kids.
For the sweet little girl who brought me a Dr. Pepper when I had a headache last week. For the quiet boy who always turns in his homework on time. For the girl who never turns in her homework at all. For the kid who called me a fat bitch last Tuesday. I would take a bullet for each and every one of them. I know it unconditionally. If I didn’t, I don’t think I could do this job anymore. That’s why I’m here- in the chair closest to the door, the last thing between them and whatever might come for them.
It’s hard to explain how it feels to get that email in the morning, from the Assistant Principal, about the lockdown drill scheduled for 9am. Turn off the lights. Doors locked. Window covered. Silence. Wait for 2 administrators to end the drill. If we shake the door handles or pound on the doors, don’t make a sound. Push a few desks against the door to practice making a barricade. Tell the kids to hold their library books against their chests- they could help act as a shield.
Imagine- telling kids to grab their copy of Harry Potter, of Dork Diaries, of Warrior Cats and hold it against their chest. As if the newest Diary of a Wimpy Kid is going to save them. As if Hunger Games will stop a bullet.
I was 8 when Columbine happened. I don’t remember it, at least, not very well. I remember having lockdown drills after that in school. I remember hating them.
I was 16 when Virginia Tech happened. I was in my chemistry class. My teacher turned on the news, white as a sheet. We watched in silence.
I was 21 when Sandy Hook happened. In college. Learning to be a teacher. I remember sitting in my Adolescent Development class as the news started pouring into our phones. I remember the grief. I remember the anger. I remember the fear that filled that room full of young adults on their way to be teachers.
I’m 27 now, and there’s Parkland. A teacher, with my own classroom, with 25 7th graders sitting in the dark, listening for our principal’s footsteps in the hallways, pretending to be a shooter.
I don’t know what the solution is. I’m not even sure what the problem is. People will tell you it’s so many things- guns, kids these days, a lack of discipline, a lack of respect, toxic masculinity, white male entitlement, mental illness, violent video games, everything is on the table. Maybe all teachers just need guns in their classrooms (an idea that makes me physically ill.) Maybe we need to ban those damn AR-15s (The guns used in Orlando, Las Vegas, Newtown, Sutherland Springs, and now Parkland.) Maybe we need to have a real conversation about how we raise our boys, how we stop radicalization and violence before it boils over into this. Maybe we need more gun training and more school counselors and more honest conversations about who we are as a people. I can’t say exactly what we need.
CaptainBubblebath 