So I used to make this joke all the time. Now I have chronic tinnitus. For those of you who don’t know what that is, it’s nerve damage in your ears which often comes as a result of being constantly exposed to very loud noise for a long period of time. The nerve damage results in a constant ringing/buzzing in your ears. So far there’s no cure. The severity of it varies, and I’m lucky to have a mild case, which I can barely hear during the day and is easy to block out at night. That said, loads of people with tinnitus aren’t so lucky. Severe tinnitus can’t be blocked out. Those who suffer from it also suffer from severe loss of sleep, depression, anxiety…. the list goes on. Tinnitus also comes with a degree of hearing loss in most cases, making it even harder to ignore. In fact, some people with severe tinnitus kill themselves just to make the ringing stop. Tinnitus can be so severe that it drives a person to suicide. Chronic tinnitus used to mostly be prevalent in older people who worked for years with loud machinery etc, but all of a sudden it’s becoming more common in our generation. Why? Because of people, like me, who listened to their music too goddamn loudly through their headphones.
Deaf by the time you’re 20? Please. That’s the least of your worries.
Please reblog. This post reminded me to move my music further away and turn it down. Someone else may need to be more cautious of their shit too.
Chronic mild tinnitus here, too, due to too many metal concerts in my youth. Turn your headphones down a little. Wear earplugs at concerts. Protect your ears.
Your eyes have an iris that can shrink down, and eyelids that can squint shut, to protect them from light that is too bright. Your ears have NOTHING to block out sounds that are too loud. It’s up to you.
Tinnitus sufferer from drumline in high school checking in. These days I wear earplugs at concerts, rehearsals, clubs, and even movies sometimes. Get yourself a set that look like these ones:
Etymotics Research was one of the first companies I’m aware of to widely market with this
sort of ear plug, and they’re great, because they reduce noise fairly
evenly across the spectrum, and so you hear everything accurately, just
quieter. While they’re certainly more expensive than the foam earplugs
that you see everywhere, they also are washable and last for months and
months, and sound great, if not better than without for live music. Please protect your ears. There is no way to recover lost
hearing.
Apparently I had this. I just thought silence was a ringing sound
you also might have even been “born” with this. a lot of people with sensory issues (especially autistic or ADD/ADHD people) experience this when it’s silent around them but havent actually hurt their ears with music at all.
so its also a sensory processing thing and you can be “born” with it (aka develop with it in childhood) like i have
Wait I thought that ringing was normal?? I hear ringing when its dead silent are you seriously saying my ADHD causes this???? I thought everyone had that???!!??!
normal people dont have that ringing noise. while it’s minor in cases of sensory development issues from developmental disorders, it can be severe if a person with a developmental disorder listens to loud music. i know that sometimes during a sensory overload from autism, the ringing will become terribly loud
Oh lord ok. Be careful with loud noises. Gotcha. I didnt realize not everyone hears that ringing. I thought it was normal so I never asked if anyone else heard it too. Thanks for the warning about loud music! Ive always tried to avoid going to concerts because of the ringing but I thought it was a thing everyone put up with and that I was being a wimp. Im glad I have an explanation!
If I sound pleased about this, it’s only because my programmers made this my default tone of voice! I’m actually quite depressed! | PayPal | Patreon
when is was like 5 i thought it was like, a normal constant sound that came with being alive on a populous planet/in the universe, kinda like gravity or light or smthn, until I figured out that other people can actually hear silence
When people talked about the sound of silence I thought that’s what they meant. But yeah I’ve had it for as long as I can remember.
i’m autistic and i used to play in a punk band and go to a lot of rock shows in the 90′s. the ringing is always there. it always will be. could drive me crazy if i let it, but i’m a practical type, so i just deal. but you don’t want this if you don’t have to have it. turn your shit down, y’all.
Dealing with
executive dysfunction and ADHD becomes so much easier when you stop trying to
do things the way you feel like you should
be able to do them (like everyone else) and start finding ways that
actually work for you, no matter how “silly” or “unnecessary”
they seem.
For
years my floor was constantly covered in laundry. Clean laundry got
mixed in with dirty and I had to wash things twice, just making more
work for myself. Now I just have 3 laundry bins: dirty (wash it
later), clean (put it away later), and mystery (figure it out later).
Sure, theoretically I could sort my clothes into dirty or clean as
soon as I take them off and put them away straight
out of the dryer, but
realistically that’s never going to be a sustainable strategy for me.
How
many garbage bins do you need in a bedroom? One? WRONG! The correct
answer is one within arms reach at all times. Which for me is three.
Because am I really going to
get up to blow my nose when I’m hyperfocusing? NO. In
allergy season I even have
an empty kleenex box for “used
tissues I can use again.”
Kinda gross? Yeah. But less gross than a
snowy winter landscape of dusty germs on my
desk.
I
used to be late all the time
because I couldn’t find my house key. But it costs $2.50 and 3
minutes to copy a key, so now there’s one in my backpack, my purse,
my gym bag, my wallet, my desk, and hanging on my door. Problem
solved.
I’m
like a ninja for getting pout the door past reminder notes without noticing. If I really don’t want to forget something, I make a
physical barrier in front of my door. A
sticky note is a lot easier to walk past than a two foot high
cardboard box with my wallet on top of it.
Executive dysfunction is always going to cause challenges, but often half the struggle is trying to cope by pretending not to have executive dysfunction, instead of finding actual solutions.
i left cabinet doors open all my life and couldn’t make myself stop leaving them open until i figured out my subconscious just wants to know where everything is at a glance. i put labels on each cabinet door for what was behind the cabinet and after that i was a lot better at closing them.
showers are hard for me because they involve a lot of steps to get in and out. buying cleaning hand wipes helps me stay a lot cleaner and happier when i’m too tired or distracted to make myself be a normal person– they’re faster and involve way less prep time, decision making, and unpleasant physical sensations.
i have disordered eating because, again, getting food is complicated, much less cooking anything. buying 10-12$ of cliff bars at a go and keeping them in my room by my bed gives me a headstart on breakfast and lets me take my meds on time. otherwise i would lie in bed, not taking my meds because i had to eat, and not eating because i was too tired and nauseous from being hungry to get out of bed.
‘just try harder’ is not a solution. figuring out the actual problem and addressing it is the solution.
’normal’ isn’t the goal. you can’t be normal. it’s too late, but you know what, fuck normal. trying to be normal is going to kill you. ‘functional’ is the goal, and you can be functional. you can kick ass at functional. and that’s a lot better.
When I talk about how there is no universal system for Keeping Your Shit Together, and how it’s more important to find a system that works for you, this is exactly the kind of thing I mean.
My keys hang on the door so I literally can’t leave my apartment without touching them. My socks kept getting everywhere when I kept them with my other clothes, so instead I now keep them in a little hutch in the kitchen, where I keep all my shoes. All my silverware is in jars on my kitchen island so I can see clearly when I am out of forks. When I didn’t want to put on my socks to go running, I bought running shoes that didn’t require socks. There are people who would find all of the above unworkable and/or appalling but they don’t have to live my life and I do.
Find what works for you and work it. Doesn’t matter if it’s weird or unusual or not as healthy as some weird ideal which is probably just a marketing tool anyway. If it works, work it.
but what are some sundown towns do y’all know of? like if someone were to do a cross-country trip, what are some towns they should absolutely not go through?
Small towns in south ga and noth fla
Ga: Jonesboro, tifton, Albany, valdosta, Macon
Fla: Gainesville, Perry, Madison, Marianna, Quincy, Jefferson county, hell I wouldn’t stop in Tallahassee either
Texas: Vidor, Orange, Deep Santa Fe
Texas: Jasper & Lumberton
I’m from Albany and recently the police beat up a young brother for no reason. They were attempting to say he had drugs but he of course had nothing.
If you go to Stone Mountain and find yourself on the trails close to night leave because they still have active Klan rallys up there
I was driving through north Florida during the day and I felt uncomfortable
The Negro Motorist Green Book was guide for black folk traveling in the 60s. It’s gives a breakdown of sundown towns. 50 years later, I’m sure it’s still relevant.
I feel like the Deep South is just a gamble.
Ohio…just in general
Central Florida, especially the little towns. If you must stop to pump gas, pay away the pump and get outta there asap
Once you get out of St. Louis county start being careful.
St. Genevieve, MO is definitely a no go for me if I’m traveling south.
If traveling in Louisiana stay away from small town with low speeding zones. If you are to go into those please drive the speed limit and don’t stop for gas. You will get a ticket for tint of your car. If your military I pay you drive the speed limit and don’t have a military tag. Get gas in the daylight.
I’m glad you’re looking out for your bros, at the same time it’s a pathetic look at the country in the 21st century.
Saving this and reblogging for myself and my tumblr fam stay safe love you guys (also check the notes for comments on more cities to avoid)
Ohio: Hartville, Sebring, Salem are all in NE Ohio. Had the worst experience of my life in Hartville.
Mississippi. Just. All of it. Especially if you’re LGBT and a POC.
WHAT TO DO AT AN ICE CHECKPOINT, ESPECIALLY IF YOU’RE A WHITE CITIZEN
(please, please, please copy, paste, and share widely):
-Border Patrol can verify citizenship within 100 miles of a border or “external boundary.” This includes coastlines so NYC is within the 100-mile zone.
-Border patrol can only ask brief questions about citizenship, and they cannot hold you for an extended time without cause.
-You always have the right to remain silent. You do not need to answer their questions.
-***WITH THAT SAID, IF YOU ARE A BORN CITIZEN OF THE UNITED STATES AND ESPECIALLY IF YOU ARE WHITE, YOU NEED TO SPEAK THE FUCK UP.***
-The most important acts of resistance are the small ones. Make it difficult and uncomfortable for ICE agents to do their jobs. They are counting on citizens to turn a blind eye and allow them to deport undocumented citizens without challenge. Disabuse of that notion.
-If you are on a train, bus, or anything else and ICE or CBP boards, you need to stand up and loudly let everyone know that they have the right to remain silent or only answer questions in the presence of an attorney, no matter their citizenship or immigration status. There have been numerous reports that confronting the agents in this way has caused them to leave without verifying citizenship. THIS CAN SAVE LIVES.
-If you see anyone being held up by immigration, loudly ask if they are being detained and if they are free to go.
-Immigration officers cannot detain anyone without reasonable suspicion, an agent must have specific facts about you that make it reasonable to believe you are committing or committed, a violation of immigration law or federal law.
If an agent detains you, you can ask for their basis for reasonable suspicion, and they should tell you.
-Always say no to a search and let everyone know that they can and should refuse consent to a search.
-They cannot search or arrest anyone without facts about that make it probable that they are committing, or committed, a violation of immigration law or federal law.
-Silence alone meets neither of these standards. Nor does race or ethnicity alone suffice for either probable cause or reasonable suspicion
-As white citizens, we have a level of privilege which protects us from retaliation from ICE for being “rude” and making a scene, which makes it our DUTY to speak up and make sure people without the same privilege know their rights. GET LOUD. YELL. YELL IN SPANISH IF YOU KNOW IT. LET PEOPLE KNOW THEY DON’T HAVE TO SAY SHIT. MAKE ICE UNCOMFORTABLE. THROW SAND IN THE GEARS OF WHITE SUPREMACY.
BONUS INFO:
-It is perfectly legal to record immigration agents as long as you are not on government property or at a port of entry. If your train/bus gets board, pull your phone out and start videotaping immediately.
-If you are detained or see someone getting detained, get the agent’s name, number, and any other identifying information. Get it on tape.
-Contact the ACLU if you see someone’s rights being violated.
“Oh yeah, every time that dad forgets mom is dead, we head to the cemetery so he can see her gravestone.”
WHAT. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard some version of this awful story. Stop taking people with dementia to the cemetery. Seriously. I cringe every single time someone tells me about their “plan” to remind a loved one that their loved one is dead.
I also hear this a lot: “I keep reminding mom that her sister is dead, and sometimes she recalls it once I’ve said it.” That’s still not a good thing. Why are we trying to force people to remember that their loved ones have passed away?
If your loved one with dementia has lost track of their timeline, and forgotten that a loved one is dead, don’t remind them. What’s the point of reintroducing that kind of pain? Here’s the thing: they will forget again, and they will ask again. You’re never, ever, ever, going to “convince” them of something permanently.
Instead, do this:
“Dad, where do you think mom is?”
When he tells you the answer, repeat that answer to him and assert that it sounds correct. For example, if he says, “I think mom is at work,” say, “Yes, that sounds right, I think she must be at work.” If he says, “I think she passed away,” say, “Yes, she passed away.”
People like the answer that they gave you. Also, it takes you off the hook to “come up with something” that satisfies them. Then, twenty minutes later, when they ask where mom is, repeat what they originally told you.
I support this sentiment. Repeatedly reminding someone with faulty memory that a loved one has died isn’t a kindness, it’s a cruelty. They have to relieve the loss every time, even if they don’t remember the grief 15 minutes later.
In other words, don’t try to impose your timeline on them in order to make yourself feel better. Correcting an afflicted dementia patient will not cure them. They won’t magically return to your ‘real world’. No matter how much you might want them to.
It’s a kindness of old age, forgetting. Life can be very painful. Don’t be the one ripping off the bandage every single time.
I can’t believe we have to explain to people that they shouldn’t introduce traumatizing revelations to people who are neurologically incapable of processing and healing from the trauma.
Pro tip from a former Jared’s salesperson: You want a sparkly white rock that will look like a diamond to the untrained eye and will literally cost the price of a nice dinner for two? Created white sapphire. They’re lab grown and cost *pennies* to make, so you can get a 1 or 2 carat white sapphire for like… $30-80 probably. You can get one as huge as you like, perfectly clear, perfectly flawless. And no one will ever be able to tell the difference except a professional appraiser. Also, sapphires are the second-hardest gemstone (right after diamonds) so they are very durable! Very unlikely that they’ll chip or crack. Get that bitch set in sterling silver and you are GOOD TO GO. Whole thing should cost you less than $200 unless you get a fancy band with a lot of extra stones. Of course, created sapphires come in every color of the rainbow, so if you want something more exciting than plain white, you TOTALLY CAN.
Created sapphires and silver: The poor Millennial’s engagement ring.
THANK YOU EX-JARED’S BASED GOD.
engagement rings: HACKED
Get a ring from an antique store. They’re usually less than $100, you know they hold up over time, no one else will have one like it, and it comes with the bonus of being haunted by the spirit of some old woman named Edith probably.
Please, reblog! IIt’s called self defense. Apart from having here, in the US, one of the highest cases of homicide and rape in the world and high rate of GBV, think about how this could help your mother or sister
Roe v. Wade — the landmark Supreme Court case establishing access to abortion as a constitutional right — has been settled law for over 40 years, yet remains under constant attack. With President Donald Trump in office, we face potentially the greatest threat to reproductive rights in more than a generation. The Center for Reproductive Rights updated our 2007 report, What If Roe Fell?, in order to answer the question on everyone’s mind on the 45th anniversary of Roe: what will happen if Roe were toppled in your state, the day after?
CaptainBubblebath 