all public school anti-bullying activism is extremely transparent and meaningless
faculty: BULLYING IS BAD!! ZERO TOLERANCE POLICY!! THIS IS A HATE FREE ZONE!!
me: hey this person called me a stupid dyke today
faculty: hmm that’s unfortunate. have you tried perhaps, not being gay?
I feel like everyone is against bullying until they actually look at the kids who are being bullied.
The cheesy anti-bullying tapes that they show in schools feature these skinny straight white neurotypical kids who get picked on for no reason. Usually the insults are something along the lines of “You’re a loser!” or “Get lost, freak.” All the kids watching immediately feel bad for the victim, and think “Aw! She didn’t deserve that!”
Then, ten minutes later, they go pick on some marginalized kid without thinking twice. As an autistic person, I was often this kid. The insults I heard growing up were not “You’re a loser!” or “Get lost, freak.” They were “Don’t let the retard work with us” or “Shouldn’t she be going to the special school?”
The problem is we teach kids that bullying occurs for no other reason other than just to be mean. This could not be further from the truth. Bullying occurs because as a society, we condition kids into hating fat, black, neurodivergent, queer, and disabled people. Kids don’t bully each other just to be mean. They do it because if something’s “wrong” with the person, it’s completely justified.
But of course, we can’t tell kids this kind of stuff. We can’t say, “Hey! Making fun of your gay classmate is bad!”
Because when we do, suddenly the phone calls come pouring in, each with a parent on the other end screaming “You can’t be feeding my son that liberal propaganda!”
there’s also the fact that schools rarely do much about bullies verbally harassing people, and only care when the victims retaliate (especially if the victim is upset enough to physically retaliate), because “oh but you’re supposed to be BETTER than them! fighting doesn’t solve anything!!” is easier for people who are supposed to be protectors and guardians to say than for them to actually do anything useful or concrete to stop the actions of the bullies in question. The fact that if a victim of bullying is upset enough to retaliate, both parties are treated as equally guilty says a lot.
see also: how this carries over into society as a whole and people who harass and abuse minorities are defended and treated sympathetically because “free speech!!!” but the second someone makes it clear they will not tolerate that kind of behavior and will react with physical violence if necessary to protect themselves and others, they’re blamed for “causing problems” and “being violent” because people like to pretend verbal abuse doesn’t count as a threat. We live in a society that actively teaches bullies they can get away with their behavior as long as they want, because the authorities will always have their back.
do older generations not get fatalistic humor?? like the other day my friend’s parents were hanging around and we were joking and i was like “well no matter what i can always fling myself off the nearest cliff” and they didn’t laugh then later the mom pulled me aside and was like “maybe you should get some help, sweetie” like stfu?? help? in this economy? i don’t think so, debra
I honestly don’t think they get it as a coping mechanism, they think it’s a cry for help rather than actually helping.
i’d even say it’s past just coping and is also now a category of Stuff Kids Got Used To When No One Was Looking; not everyone using that humor is even covering up something bigger, we just stopped thinking fatalistic = taboo/unspeakable somewhere along the line, and most parents don’t seem to know why or how ~
My boss opened a door and missed me by inches, he said “whoops, almost killed you there!” My result of “Oh, if only.” Led to an awkward end of shift debrief.
This generation shares the same humor as the goddamn Addams Family and the previous generation is the White Sixties Family™ that lives next door and runs away screaming at the end of the episode
I’m all for the Addams method, so keep going please.
What is even the point of intentionally messing up someone’s order? Like, for instance, someone orders a skinny latte and you give them a regular, they order gluten-free bread and you give them wheat, etc. Why? Think about it:
Best case scenario: Nothing happens. If a girl who looks thin already thinks she got a soy but it’s whole milk, she’s not going to gain any weight because one latte won’t really matter in the grand scheme of things. If they just wanted gluten free because they want to try gluten free stuff, but got gluten exactly once, they will never notice. What’s the fun in that? Some dumb, twisted satisfaction at the fact that you lied to someone who trusted you?
Worst case scenario: They have a medical condition that is triggered by certain ingredients, and because your dumb ass gave it to them anyway, they’re going to react to that ingredient horribly. Maybe the skinny girl who ordered sugar free is a type 1 diabetic. Maybe the guy who asked for gluten free has celiac. Maybe they have a life-threatening allergic reaction and you kill someone, all because you get off on intentionally deceiving customers who put their trust in you.
2. REALLY helpful for those who are partially deaf, have APD (like me and my sister) or any other hearing problem
3. really helpful for those who can’t focus well, especially for those with ADD/ADHD (like me)
4. Is incredibly helpful for people learning a second language, or for bilingual people who can read better than they can hear
5. Even if you aren’t into learning the language, there are countless amazing foreign movies and songs you really can’t enjoy without subtitles!
6. Can help people (like my sister) who have reading comprehension
7. Can help when you’re having a party and you don’t want to pause every time someone wants to make a comment/joke
8. Can help when the characters in the show have a heavy accent (especially in period shows)
9. Let’s be honest subtitles can really add to the humor of the show! (”sobs mathematically”, “screeches loudly”, “angrily fixes bowtie”)
10. Can let people watch content without headphones, or in areas of loud noises.
11. Alternatively, If someone has sensitive hearing or is triggered by loud noises, they can turn the volume down low and still be able to enjoy the content
12. The last bit is VERY true for movies where they switch between soft speaking and LOUD BOOMING NOISES (I’m looking at you hunger games)
13. Very good for helping young kids recognize and associate words and learn to read faster!
14. Really good when you’re eating chips/crunchy candy and can’t hear the movie
15. IS A NECESSITY FOR DEAF PEOPLE!!!
I can’t even tell you how many of my friends made fun of me for needing subtitles, to the point of where I just don’t bother with them anymore. Asking for subtitles at an event is the scariest thing I can imagine. People often complain that it “gets in the way” of their movie. Watching shows (especially in loud areas or with people who talk a lot) is incredibly frustrating for me. People often think I’m stupid for not understanding a show or needing to rewind when someone talks. Most Youtube users don’t bother to create subtitles for their videos (and auto-generated subtitles are crap). I just wish people were nicer to people who need subtitles, and that they were more accessible on other platforms.
why dont we ever talk about how movies condition girls to associate glasses and curly hair with ugliness because that is so fucking damaging to young girls who grow up seeing girls who look like them always be the “before” of every makeover
read this post. read it again. read it two more times. read it aloud. i want this to be ingrained into peoples’ minds
i thought i’d make an faq filled with every excuse in the book about reposting, for those who still don’t understand why it’s bad…or for people who don’t know what to say in retaliation to these! so here we go.
first of all, an artist doesn’t even NEED to explain themselves. in the same way with someone who says “dude, make sure that soda is diet” or “please don’t tickle me”. they don’t want you to do it. you don’t need to test them by ignoring them. the reason doesn’t matter: it’s the person’s wish with THEIR things. if you had any respect for others, you’d just take it at that.
BUT for some people, they don’t want to respect others at face value, and want their reason. (which, i might add, is rude.) so let’s get into that:
but i’m giving you exposure! isn’t that good?
no.
you’re not giving artists exposure. for people like myself, freelance artists, you’re hurting us. about a year ago, i sent my portfolio off to an indie game. in it, i had a piece of work that had been reposted (that i didn’t even know about). i was told much later that they “looked into it” and saw that my work was posted by someone else, which means now they have no idea who the artist was, and THEREFORE can’t be sure my work was legit. i lost a potential job to a repost.
doesn’t matter if you say “i didn’t draw this”. sometimes, they don’t even look. they just look to see if it’s on any site other than your own. and that’s terrifying for artists. so don’t endanger our livelihood for instagram likes.
besides, you’re not even giving exposure if you didn’t credit, cropped out the signature, or somehow made the resolution so low to where you can’t even see the signature. which brings me to…
but i credited you!
some people still don’t want it reposted even with credit. the last answer should show you one of the many reasons why.
you’re dictating what i can/cannot put on my page! this is MY page!
and it’s MY art you posted. you can’t take something i did and do whatever you want with it. imagine if you took someones drawing, photocopied it, and spread it all around the town without their permission. they’d have every right to be angry, right?
but you posted it online, which means anyone can do anything with it. so if you don’t want it reposted, don’t post it online!
i have to post my art onto my websites to build a fanbase, something crucial to an artist. it shouldn’t be on ME to not post it in the first place, it should be on YOU to not repost it. you’re just echoing victim-blaming arguments.
you’re basically saying “if you don’t want to be bullied, don’t exist.” which is a terrible thing to teach people, rather than “be nice and respectful towards others.” yes, i know our world isn’t perfect. but that’s no excuse to contribute to vile things.
well i would be honored if someone reposted my art. and my friend doesn’t mind reposts, so why should you?
good for you! good for them! but did you know there’s more people in the world other than just you and your friend? we have wishes and feelings too, so you don’t get to project your own emotions onto what WE should be feeling as well. i love peaches. some people don’t like them. that doesn’t mean that now they have to eat peaches because i don’t mind them.
what an artist creates automatically belongs to society, though.
go steal the mona lisa and tell me how that works out.
everyone can VIEW it, yes. artists want others to view their work! we just don’t want you to do stuff with it we asked you not to do.
WELL THEN SPEAKING OF THAT, since i can’t put your work on redbubble and sell it for myself, why do you have an umbrella of the starry night?? huh?? you STOLE van gogh’s work! (yes people have legit said this to me)
putting my work on items and selling it is totally illegal. van gogh’s work is owned by companies now, who have authorization to print it on things. and i’m just ONE freelance artist who is, you know, still alive and not giving permission to do that. you can’t compare a dead artist from the 1800s to a digital artist in 2017. apples to oranges, my dude.
well i SAID “credit to the artist” so i DID give you credit!
because saying “the artist” really tells people who i am and lets them visit my websites! thank you so much!
but all sarcasm aside, that doesn’t do anything other than show you were too lazy to find the artist. same thing with “source: the internet” and “who drew this xD” or misspelling my url on purpose or putting the credit under a cut. OR cropping the image to cut off my signature! you didn’t give me credit.
it wasn’t on the website i wanted it on! you should have more social media.
i’ll have the social media i want to have. not up to me to make more accounts on more things just so you won’t disrespect me.
but i don’t remember where i got it. besides, i reposted SOOO much work and saved it all a long time ago. how can i find it now?
reverse google image search is so great.
also, if you didn’t know the artist, that’s a HUGE reason not to repost it in the first place!! you didn’t even know if it was okay since you never got to see their position on that!!
take down your video with stolen fan art. take down your entire fan art twitter account. i don’t care “how hard it was to save those images” or “how many views you have now”. you got all that attention from someone else’s hard work. searching for art will never be as hard as making it. if it were that easy, you’d be drawing all the art yourself.
but i asked the artist and they didn’t say anything! i assumed it was okay.
yeah, i feel you. it’s the same thing as when you ask your mom if you can borrow some money, she doesn’t answer, so you just steal it from her purse. no answer means the answer you want to hear, right?
wrong. don’t take “unresponsive” as a yes. that’s disgusting.
well i honestly don’t care. artists are just selfish. i’ll repost their art if i want to, just to show them how much i hate their stance on reposting. and (insert another really edgy statement here from someone who only says things to get a rise out of people since their life is empty)
one day you’re gonna come across an artist who has no chill and wants to sue, and can actually do it, since some people put their work under HEAVY copyright. and i’m gonna kick back in my chair with a nice capri sun and watch it all happen, since you have that kind of attitude towards people.
yes, this whole thing seems a bit. well. “salty”, as some would put it. and i have every right to be irritated over this. all these questions are asking “WHY should i respect their wishes? give me a reason” or “but here is my excuse rather than just taking it down”. time after time, artists are villainized just for telling people not to repost.
like i said, the artist not wanting you to repost it SHOULD be reason enough! we’re so tired of having to fight people just to have respect for our art. we have to deal with tracing constantly, so can you please take reposting off our plates? i know bad things will always happen, but that’s no reason to make it worse by contributing.
artists are generously putting our art out there for free. if you want to keep seeing our art for free (btw we don’t HAVE to, all the big artists could just up and leave and go to patreon), maybe show us some respect? because we get pretty dejected when we see strangers getting attention from something we did, and it makes us want to remove everything we show you guys. you say “don’t post it then!” but would be mad if all fan art disappeared.
if you want to keep the art, respect the artist making it. there’s a real person behind that drawing.
harry james potter (deserves your respect & love) (pt 1 because all my harry love cannot begin to be contained in one set of graphs. this boy went through a helluvalot and gave the same and damn you if you don’t adore him)
Stop abusing your boyfriends and yes what you are doing is abuse.
Stop:
Yelling at him in front of his friends
Hitting or slapping him when he does or says something you don’t like
Telling him he doesn’t have a choice when it comes to decisions that involve both of you
Telling him he can’t hang out with friends because you don’t like him
Telling him to not talk to other girls even if they are his friend
Forcing him to spend every moment with you
Belittling him and pointing out all his flaws
Calling him stupid or making fun of him for making a mistake
Threatening to break up with him if he doesn’t do what you want
Being emotionally manipulative and crying until he does what you want
Accusing him of cheating every time he’s not with you
Blow up is phone if he doesn’t text you every five minutes
Telling him you are the must thing that has ever happened to him and no one else will love
Physically attacking him when ever you are mad
Forcing him to have sex despite that fact that he said he didn’t want to
Invading his privacy by going through his phone
Getting mad at him for changing his password and demanding he tell you what it is
If a guy did any of these things to a girl it would be considered abuse but since its the other way around its considered normal. Throughout High school I saw many girl treating their boyfriends like shit. Sometime even physically abusing them in the hallways and no one trying to stop it because its a girl attacking a boy.
Boys: If your girlfriend does anything on this list leave her. It is abuse and you deserve better.
Girls: if you find your self doing anything on this list to your boyfriend you need to knock it off because you are being abusive.
!!!!!!!!
My brother was abused by his babies mom and it started like this and escalated to child abuse and neglect.
You don’t deserve to be screamed at, ignored, or assaulted.
Not showing affection when she wants or not hugging her before class) or missing a phone call doesn’t warrant getting cussed out or hit.
Lol, I lost 5 followers from reblogging this. That’s fine, y’all can go
Whole lot of grown women do this too.
Just wanna throw these in too
Being passive aggressive with him when he wants to spend time with friends or doing other things
controlling when he’s able to go out with friends
Breaking up his friendships with other girls just because you’re insecure
Making him feel like his opinions in decisions that affect the both of you are irrelevant and don’t matter
testing him in anyway in general without his knowledge or permission (example: catfishing! it’s manipulative and weird don’t fucking do that)
taking money/credit cards without permission to spend on things without his knowledge ( had an ex friend do this constantly to her boyfriend and she’d always condone it because “he’ll get over it” )
guilting him for hanging out with friends/family over you and making him choose between you and friends/family
telling him “you don’t love me if you *insert harmless activity he wants to do here* “
being rude or mean to him in front of others to assert dominance or power over him
downloading apps to spy on his phone activity (yes, this is a thing “”regular”” people do) or snooping on his social media to see who he’s talking to
hitting him, slapping him, punching him, shoving him. literally how do people not understand slapping your male partner is bad. people tend to find this funny in media and society and its weird. KEEP YOUR HANDS OFF YOUR PARTNER WITHOUT PERMISSION.
I come from a family of very forward and manipulative women and i see it in media all the time. it’s fucked and people need to not be accepting of young girls acting like snot-nosed, abusive shit heads that think they can get away with manipulation and cruelty because they happen to be girls.
and let me add this. ABUSIVE TEEN GIRLFRIENDS TURN INTO ABUSIVE GROWN ASS WOMEN GIRLFRIENDS WHO TURN INTO ABUSIVE WIVES.
if you have an abusive teen or young adult gf right now fellas, leave. don’t let her use you to get her shit right. you’ll be so fucked up by the time she gets it together if she ever does and believe that most likely she won’t.
Can i just add that ive seen young queer girls do this to their girlfriends. Girls can be abusers and you are right to leave.
Women/young girls can definitely be just as abusive. I knew a young man that got ran over and had his leg broken by his girlfriend because (in her words he annoyed her) He refused to press charges.
Another young lady started to hit her ex boyfriend because he wouldn’t take her back because of the abuse. He called the cops on her and they literally started laughing at him because she was very petite in comparison to him. Anyone can be abusive and I wish more people understood that.
dammit I’d spam my blog if i reblog this more than once but dude this is really important.
I know we ask of men to call out their homeboys when they exhibit abusive behavior to their partners but women also need to interrupt this crazy girlfriend trend with their friends as well. Your friend is saying how “I’ll run that nigga over” or you sit next to her while she calls him obsessively a billion times leaving the most insane screaming voice messages or you see her slap her boyfriend in the face all the time but all you do is laugh or pretend it’s no big deal because she’s just a girl how harmful can she be right? It’s not any different. You don’t know how the stress is effecting her partner in silence. Abuse and controlling behavior coming from anyone is not okay.
