Tag: happy birthday!

I felt in good health. My fitness scores were high. I’d always looked after my body. When they told me I had a tumour in my liver, I got a huge shock. But this can happen to anyone, whatever your age, whatever your job. You can have all the money in the world but nothing prepares you for cancer. I had an operation and, incredibly, returned to the first-team fold within six weeks. Only 71 days had passed since the operation when I played my first 90 minutes — in the 3-1 victory over Manchester United in the Champions League final at Wembley. That game was an obsession for me. I was determined to get myself right. Pep was amazing, sending me messages saying: ‘Keep going, we are all counting on you to be there’. What a night; in a famous stadium, your Wembley Stadium. I’d always admired English football. I like Liverpool. I had the chance to sign in 2006, when Rafa Benitez was manager.

Gerard Houllier tried to persuade me to go but Barcelona came in. As a kid, I adored Diego Maradona and my dream was always to play where he had played. Carles Puyol was captain at Wembley. We were making that walk up the famous steps and as we were getting towards the trophy he turned round to me and said: ‘You will lift the trophy’. It was an amazing gesture. Pep worked for hours on end on positioning, technical skills and adapting training to a game situation. We played small-sided games in tiny, confined areas at a high intensity to make us think more quickly. The less space you have, the quicker you need to react and move the ball on. Then when you lose it, hunt in packs and retrieve it as fast as possible.
And we had Messi. The genius of football, a phenomenon — somebody only God can produce. After the final, I hoped I had seen off my tumor.

Then a check-up, a cancer had returned with a vengeance and I would now require a liver transplant. Dani Alves offered me his liver. He was serious but I could never have accepted it. He also has a family and a career. It is a massive operation and it was too much. It was far worse this time. I did not have chemo but the transplant had its own complications. My immune system had to accept the new liver. I was in hospital for 42 days. I was in awful pain. I would return for admissions that would last between a week and 10 days. My life had changed radically. There was no more training, no more laughing and joking with team-mates; only drawn-out, solitary days lying in a hospital bed. You cannot switch off. You do not forget that you have cancer. It is always there, in your mind, and physically, I felt so weak. My weight plummeted. I lost over two stone. For seven months, I didn’t do anything. I couldn’t. I had no strength.

It was draining. No sport, no training. There were dark days where I was terrified that I would never be able to play again. I would wake up and barely have the strength to move a muscle. I didn’t let the Barca players come to the hospital. I didn’t want people to see me like that. Support flooded in. Signed shirts arrived from Europe’s leading clubs. I was sitting at home when a package arrived from the Far East. I opened it up and thousands of butterflies flew out around my living room. It was different and beautiful. It was so humbling to think that these people cared so much. For me, the important thing was that I was able to go on my terms. I made the decision, the cancer did not make it for me. Cancer has changed my life. I am a better person. I prioritise what is important: my wife, my little girls, my friends, travelling with the family. I just want to enjoy every second.