lavvyan:

blue-bird-of-two-faces:

spottytonguedog:

maneth985:

phil-of-the-phuture:

anonymouscatperson:

livebloggingmydescentintomadness:

catf8sh:

bye-onara:

robotbisexual:

karajames:

poonpie:

thesoftgrape:

thehumorousace:

lgbtqpjo:

People need to realize that there’s a difference between straight people and Straight People™

Straight person: Hey, you got a new haircut. Looks really good.

Straight Person™: No homo, but your haircut looks good on you.

In case you were confused 👌

Just like how there are white people who are gay and then there are the White Gays

White people who are gay: “I’m gay.”

White Gays: “I can’t believe I got accused of racism after calling that person a racial slur! I mean, I know what racism looks like because I’ve been discriminated for my sexuality. How is me being racist even possible? I’M GAY!”

Lmao all the angry White and Straight people in the comments, keep reblogging

neurotypical: i don’t have any mental illnesses or disorders
Neurotypical™: Happiness is a choice!! ✨✨Have you tried yoga? Drink more water and eat kale ✨✨

cis person: i identify completely as my assigned gender
Cis Person™: It doesn’t matter what you identify as, cause you still have Female Genitals! I’m not being offensive!! Read a book on Human Biology! 🚹🚺

men: I identify as male.

Men™: feminazis ruin everything, get back in the kitchen and make me a sandwich bitch

atheists: I don’t believe in god or identify with a religion

Atheists™: Don’t fucking talk to me if you believe in God. Open your closed-fucking-minds!! (usually targeted towards Christians)

nice guys: hey I know when not to invade someone’s space and I totally respect boundaries

Nice Guys™: IVE BEEN YOUR FRIEND FOR A MONTH AND NOW YOURE TELLING ME YOU DONT WANT TO FUCK ME ???? WHAT IS THE POINT OF WOMEN IF YOURE NOT HAVING SEX WITH ME?

this post got all kinds of better since I last saw it

This post is perfection across the board.

christians: i believe in God

Christians™: GOD IS THE ONLY GOD OH GOD IS THAT STAR A PENTAGRAM?!?!?!?!?! READ YOUR BIBLE EVERYDAY IF YOU DONT YOUVE FAILED ALSO IF YOU DISAGREE WITH ME IN ANY WAY YOURE GONNA GO TO HELL CAUSE IM A CHRISTIAN AND IM EXEMPT FROM RULES CAUSE GOD SAID SO

gamers: I like video games

Gamers™: Video Games are Art and you can keep your political correctness bullshit right out of them! Anyway that female character CHOSE to dress that way!

advanced-procrastination:

peachygoat:

armorabs:

we know plankton and krabs have been playing poker together for 15 years

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we also know this episode aired before the episode where pearl turned 16

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while the non-continuity & non-chronological order of the series means that assuming that pearl was 15 in welcome to the chum bucket is a fool’s gamble – it’s reasonable enough that if there is an episode about her turning 16, her character was likely conceptualized as being 15 years old prior to that point. but either she was 15 or she was 16 in welcome to the chum bucket … and either way, that’s about as long as pearl’s been alive.

we also know that pearl is krabs’ biological daughter … through a combination of facts … and were given reason to believe that something happened to the mother of his child shortly after pearl’s birth that made him depressed. she’s not around anymore and no longer apart of their lives in any way shape or form.

image
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we also know plankton and krabs were childhood best friends, going on to have an on-again-off-again friendship for years prior to spongebob getting a job at the krusty krab … and the two are shown to occasionally have moments where they truly, genuinely care about each other deep down, despite the rivalry …

conclusion: plankton might have started playing poker with krabs to cheer him up after the death of his wife

oh thank god i thought you were going to say plankton was pearls mom

Mpreg!plankton is what Stephen Hillenburg would have wanted

✊ Today is an Internet-wide day of action for net neutrality ✊

fight4future:

There’s been a major development over the past 24 hours: another member of Congress just came out in support of the House Congressional Review Act resolution to overturn FCC Chairman Ajit Pai’s net neutrality repeal.

This is a big deal and could help push other lawmakers do the same, but we have to act fast because the deadline is just over a week away.

Today is a massive day of action to show lawmakers that people still care about net neutrality so we’re asking everyone to click here and tell Congress not to let their chance to save net neutrality slip away.

We’ve been fighting for months without seeing any movement in Congress, watching the clock ticking down to the deadline. But Rep Joe Morelle (NY-25) his support for the Congressional Review Act (CRA) resolution could change that.

If we act fast, we can leverage this new momentum to unleash a small landslide of other representatives coming out for net neutrality before the December 10th deadline, which will make a huge difference in the battles ahead.

Today we’re asking the entire Internet to sign this open letter to Congress telling them to do the right thing and support net neutrality before it’s too late.

Your voice matters. As part of today’s Internet-wide day of action, thousands of others are speaking out, along with celebrities, musicians, and websites like Tumblr, Postmates and Etsy.

You can join them and show your support for net neutrality by submitting an ‘I support net neutrality’ photo. We will be flooding lawmakers’ social media feeds with pictures, so if they decide to vote against the open Internet we will make them look us in the eye as they do it.

Click here to sign our open letter and then submit your ‘I support net neutrality’ photo into our gallery:

We can’t let this deadline come and go without making Congress remember that the whole Internet is watching. We’re still fighting for net neutrality. And we won’t forget if they betray us.

Tell everyone you know to take action at DeadlineForNetNeutrality.com and spread the word any way you can. Click here to find ideas on how you can use your slice of the Internet – whether that’s your Tumblr blog, a website you run, or any of your social media accounts – to help get the word out. We’re counting on you!

theunnamedstranger:

jumpingjacktrash:

xenoqueer:

nettlepatchwork:

pervocracy:

Note to vacationing non-Americans: while it’s true that America doesn’t always have the best food culture, the food in our restaurants is really not representative of what most of us eat at home.  The portions at Cheesecake Factory or IHOP are meant to be indulgent, not just “what Americans are used to.”

If you eat at a regular American household, during a regular meal where they’re not going out of their way to impress guests, you probably will not be served twelve pounds of chocolate-covered cream cheese.  Please bear this in mind before writing yet another “omg I can’t believe American food” post.

Also, most American restaurant portions are 100% intended as two meals’ worth of food. Some of my older Irish relatives still struggle with the idea that it’s not just not rude to eat half your meal and take the rest home, it’s expected. (Apparently this is somewhat of an American custom.)

Until you’re hitting the “fancy restaurant” tier (the kind of place you go for a celebration or an anniversary date), a dinner out should generally also be lunch for the next day. Leftovers are very much the norm.

From the little time I’ve spent in Canada, this seems to be the case up there as well.

the portions in family restaurants (as opposed to haute cuisine types) are designed so that no one goes away hungry.

volume IS very much a part of the american hospitality tradition, and Nobody Leaves Hungry is important. but you have to recognize that it’s not how we cook for ourselves, it’s how we welcome guests and strengthen community ties.

so in order to give you a celebratory experience and make you feel welcomed, family restaurants make the portions big enough that even if you’re a teenage boy celebrating a hard win on the basketball court, you’re still going to be comfortably full when you leave.

of course, that means that for your average person with a sit-down job, who ate a decent lunch that day, it’s twice as much as they want or more. that’s ok. as mentioned above, taking home leftovers is absolutely encouraged. that, too, is part of american hospitality tradition; it’s meant to invoke fond memories of grandma loading you down with covered dishes so you can have hearty celebration food all week. pot luck church basement get-togethers where the whole town makes sure everybody has enough. that sort of thing. it’s about sharing. it’s about celebrating Plenty.

it’s not about pigging out until you get huge. treating it that way is pretty disrespectful of our culture. and you know, contrary to what the world thinks, we do have one.

kyraneko:

djadjamankh:

ofools:

ofools:

Sometimes I remember that there’s a massive beef in the paleontological community between Jack Horner and Robert Bakker and it’s so big that when they both worked as advisers on the Jurassic Park films, Spielberg made 2 characters based on them and had a T. rex eat Bakker’s character as a favour to Horner.

“The bearded paleontologist Dr. Robert Burke, who is eaten by a Tyrannosaurus rex in Steven Spielberg’s film The Lost World: Jurassic Park, is an affectionate caricature of Bakker.

In real life, Bakker has argued for a predatory T. rex, while Bakker’s rival paleontologist Jack Horner views it as primarily a scavenger.

According to Horner, Spielberg wrote the character of Burke and had him killed by the T. rex as a favor for Horner. After the film came out, Bakker recognized himself in Burke, loved the caricature, and actually sent Horner a message saying, ‘See, I told you T. rex was a hunter!’.”

God this is still funny

Academia is very serious

I’ve heard of academia fistfights and academia passive-aggressive sniping at each other in one’s published papers … now we’ve got proxy assassination by dinosaurs.